Elder sextortion: The emotional and financial toll
August 19, 2025
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Elder sextortion: The emotional and financial toll
Financial exploitation of older adults continues to evolve as fraudsters shift their tactics to digital platforms. According to the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) 2024 data, more than 147,000 Americans aged 60 and older reported falling victim to online fraud, with total losses approaching $4.9 billion. This represents a 43 percent increase in reported losses compared to 2023.
Among these crimes, elder sextortion stands out as one of the most emotionally and financially damaging. Elder sextortion is a form of blackmail that combines romance scams, impersonation, and manipulation to target older adults online. A 2024 study published in Computers in Human Behavior estimated that one in seven adults globally has experienced someone threatening to share intimate images.
The FBI reports that extortion, including sextortion, among older adults increased by 134 percent year over year. These are not isolated incidents. They are part of a growing trend in digital crime affecting some of the most vulnerable members of our communities.
For community banks and credit unions, responding to this threat is not simply a matter of fraud detection. It is about protecting customers, preserving trust, and reinforcing the financial institution's role as a safe, trusted partner.
What is elder sextortion
Elder sextortion occurs when scammers deceive older adults into sharing explicit photos, videos, or engaging in private online interactions. The fraudster then uses that content, or the threat of having it, to extort money. In many cases, the scammer never actually possesses any images. Instead, they rely on fear, shame, and the victim's concern for their family, social circle, or religious community to force compliance.
These cons often begin as online romance scams. Fraudsters are patient and calculated, gradually building emotional trust before introducing explicit content or requests. The scammer starts making demands once the relationship feels real to the victim.
While financial loss is significant, the emotional toll can be devastating. Many victims do not report the crime due to embarrassment. The resulting shame may lead to social withdrawal, depression, or, in some cases, even premature death.
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Connect with an expertHow scammers target older adults
Criminals executing sextortion scams use sophisticated tactics that take advantage of the emotional, digital, and social vulnerabilities of older adults. These include:
- Preying on loneliness or grief: Scammers identify recent widows or widowers by scanning online obituaries or public posts. They initiate contact under the guise of companionship.
- Romance scams on digital platforms: Many scams begin on dating apps, social media, or text messaging. Initial messages may seem innocent or friendly, but quickly turn flirtatious.
- The "wrong number" trick: A scammer pretends to text the wrong number. If the recipient responds, the conversation escalates into a manufactured romantic interest.
- Fake profiles and video calls: Scammers use images of attractive individuals, often stolen or computer-generated, and may encourage victims to engage in private chats. Some use deepfake technology or screen recordings to fabricate compromising content.
- Phishing links and malware: Clicking on suspicious links can give scammers access to the victim's device, camera, or personal files. Older adults with limited cybersecurity protections are particularly vulnerable.
These methods exploit both emotional trust and gaps in digital literacy. Increasingly, these scams are not random acts. Many are carried out by transnational organized crime groups that share victim information and target retirement communities or individuals identified through data breaches.
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fraud detection softwareWhen sextortion escalates
A recent case reported to the AARP Fraud Watch Network Helpline involved a 70-year-old man from Missouri. He was targeted through what he believed was a romantic relationship. After sending nude photos, he was quickly threatened with exposure unless he paid $2,500.
Soon after, another person contacted him, pretending to be a law enforcement officer. This impersonator accused him of criminal behavior related to the images and warned that his employer would be contacted if he did not send more money. The scammer knew where the man worked, intensifying the pressure.
This case demonstrates how sextortion can quickly evolve from emotional manipulation to impersonation and coercion. It also highlights the importance of financial institutions being prepared to spot signs of distress, especially when older customers make unusual transactions or appear anxious.
Protecting clients from fraud: Steps to stay safe
Fraud can happen to anyone, but the FBI advises there are practical steps financial institutions can coach their clients on to help protect them and their personal information:
- Verify before trust: If a client is contacted by someone they do not know, they should take time to research the contact’s name, phone number, email address, or the offer they are presenting. A quick online search can often reveal warnings from others who may have been targeted by similar scams.
- Avoid being rushed: Scammers often try to create urgency to pressure victims into making quick decisions. They may appeal to their emotions or promise financial gain or companionship. Advise clients to take a step back and give themselves time to evaluate the situation.
- Never share sensitive information: Clients should never give out personal or financial information, including social security number, bank details, or wire instructions, unless they have verified the legitimacy of the request.
- Take immediate action if an account is compromised: If your client suspects someone has gained access to their personal devices or financial information, they should notify their bank or credit union right away. Advise them about placing additional safeguards on their accounts and remind them to monitor their activity closely for unauthorized transactions.
How financial institutions can protect their customers from elder sextortion
Banks and credit unions serve as critical touchpoints for many older adults. When staff are trained to recognize potential fraud, they can help stop scams before more harm occurs. Proactive steps include:
- Educate frontline employees: Tellers and customer service teams should be trained to spot red flags such as abrupt wire transfers, large cash withdrawals, or changes in financial behavior. Empower staff to ask respectful, nonjudgmental questions when something seems unusual.
- Use fraud detection tools: Implement systems that monitor behavior outside a customer's typical transaction pattern. Real-time wire fraud monitoring combined with behavioral analytics helps stop fraud losses before they occur. Banks and credit unions should combine technology with transparent internal escalation processes.
- Provide targeted client education: Offer ongoing education through brochures, in-branch events, webinars, or one-on-one consultations. Topics include safe online practices, how to identify scams, and how to respond to suspicious messages.
- Partner with external agencies: Establish relationships with local law enforcement, elder protection agencies, and fraud reporting centers. Coordination can lead to faster, more effective responses when fraud is suspected.
- Foster a safe, supportive environment: Many older adults fear being judged or losing independence if they disclose being scammed. Creating a culture of support and privacy encourages disclosure and early intervention.
Why action matters
As more older adults embrace digital communication, the threat of elder sextortion will continue to grow. Financial institutions are in a strong position to detect early warning signs and respond with compassion and professionalism.
Preventing financial loss is essential, but helping clients preserve their dignity, feel supported, and recover from emotional harm is just as important. Addressing elder sextortion goes beyond risk mitigation. It reflects the core mission of community financial institutions to serve and protect. With strong fraud detection tools, well-trained teams, and a commitment to client care, banks and credit unions can be a first line of defense against this increasingly personal exploitation.
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